Stupid Idea

I have been thinking of this for the past few weeks. I wasn't sure if I should write about it in my blog since its kind of personal. This is not paranormal either, unless you think of it as an unholy union. Anyway, after much deliberation., I decided to go ahead and just write about it to get it off my chest.

Its about my sister, Aiza. She has decided to marry her good-for-nothing boyfriend. My family is very much against it, I mean, who would want an unemployed and rude person with no prospects to be part of their family? The guy, Darrell, never got along with my family. He never made an effort, unlike my other sisters boyfriends, to ingratiate himself to us. After my sister gave birth to her baby, she had told us nothing but complaints and grievances about Darrell. We were happy to hear all of this, weird as it may sound. We thought that she would not be fickle enough to change her mind about the unsuitability of their relationship. Never mind that they already have a baby. In our way of thinking, you cannot correct a mistake by making another mistake. Marrying Darrell is a mistake, mark my words.

Aiza, however, doesn't mind making another mistake. For some reason we couldn't fathom, she and Darrell are now supposedly engaged. We were very shocked about this, just days before that announcement she had been thrashing Darrell repeatedly. Is she a glutton for suffering or is she just plain stupid? Don't start on the love is blind thing, for me that's just plain silly. When you go into a relationship, you just don't pick him because he makes you giddy and that you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. You have to take into consideration if that guy could be a good provider or would treat you well. Darrell falls flat on both categories.

Maybe Aiza thinks that we would always be there to rescue her. If she persists with this ridiculous idea, I am sorry but I would be forced to harden my heart against her. I know my parents and brother and sisters would do the same. We will try to help Yannah, our niece, but the mother will never be welcome in our house again if she is still with that horrid man.

I can't believe she threw away her second chance, we were sending her to school to finish college and now its all out of the window. Aiza could just forget about me attending her wedding, I will not be part of such a travesty. She will drink from the cup of sorrow using a 10-feet spoon as long as she is with that wretched man, I am afraid. Sigh, and she had so much going for her too. She is talented and beautiful, too waste it all for a loser is so pitiful.

Well, that's enough of this tirade. Thanks for reading this far.


Charmedwishes...
Blessed be!

New Look

I am thinking of dyeing my hair. I always had dark brown hair and I have always wondered if a change of hair color would improve my looks a little. I must admit that I am a little insecure about my appearance. I mean, I am kind of chubby and I wear glasses. I have been hanging out with these 2 gorgeous girls from work and it made me realize that I also need to look my best so I wouldn't look like a FUGLY (in case you didn't watch MEAN GIRLS starring Lindsay Lohan, fugly means "friends who are ugly"). Although I know that its kind of shallow and my friends doesn't mind being with me considering how I looked, deep within me I recognize that I have to do this for myself.

Anyway, here's my picture. This was taken a few months ago. I am holding our family dog, Sweetheart:

Here's the hair color that I want:

This shade is called Chestnut Brown

Do you think it will suit me? My mom said that I will need to have my hair bleached first so I could achieve the hair color I want. My hair is not a virgin, I already had it dyed before but I always chose dark brown, something really subtle that people don't really notice I dyed my hair at all. If ever, this will be the first time I would color my hair with something extremely noticeable.

Now let's go to my eyes. I am near-sighted and I have to wear glasses almost all the time. Most people say that I look older because of my glasses and when I do take them off, they say that they never noticed before how pretty my eyes are. LOL. Of course, I will feel all giddy and flattered when they say that. Which leads me to the topic of contact lenses. I have been planning to use contact lenses for the LONGEST time but my mother is kind of against it. She says its just a waste of money since a pair would only last me for a year, tops. Also, it is kind of expensive compared to glasses and it is so high maintenance since I need eye solution and I couldn't wear glasses for more than 8 hours, I think.  This is how I look with glasses on. I am holding my niece, Yannah.

I have long debated on which color I want to use on my eyes. I finally narrowed it down to three:

Violet Eyes

Gray Eyes

Ruby Eyes

I know the last one is kind of weird. I am sure you are kind of thinking "Why would he want to have red eyes?" I was actually inspired by this anime, Jigoku Shoujo (translates as "Hell Girl"), and I kind of idolize her so I want to copy her style a little bit. I realize its kind of a nerdy thing to do and I probably would look like a demon possessed me,but hey, what have you. So what do you think?

Now let me get write about my weight. :-) I am considerably chubbier than last year and some of my clothes doesn't fit me anymore. This is really frustrating for me. I cannot go to the gym because I am not allowed by my doctor to do strenuous activities. The only option would be to go on a diet. The sad part is no matter how much resolve I have not to eat, I just couldn't help pigging out on hamburgers, fries, pizza, fried chicken. spaghetti, ice cream, chocolates, and did I mention hamburgers? Oh yes, I did.

Last Friday, my family and I went to the Mall of Asia in Pasay to do a little shopping. Of course, we got a little hungry walking around shopping so we decided to eat at KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken). My mother just had a Twister with a Banana Yogurt Krusher, my sisters had small burgers with small fries and diet Coke, while I had

KFC Double Down Burger (no bread, 2 slices of chicken, with cheese, bacon, and other fatty things)

Large Fries

Strawberry Yogurt Krusher

A small Wow Burger (I finished eating earlier than my mom and sisters so to pass the time, I ordered another burger)

A Twister (actually only half of it since my mother couldn't finished her's)

Sigh. Yes, I know this doesn't look like what a person who is supposedly on a diet should eat. I just couldn't help it. I had absolutely no willpower when it comes to food. I envy those people who could stuff their faces until they burst but still had the figure of a ramp model. Unfortunately, I am the type whose body shows every single gram of fat that I have munched on.

Oh, did I mention that we ate at Mang Inasal's (its a popular restaurant which serves grilled chicken here in the Philippines) before we went home? We got hungry again after shopping and we ate the following:

Mang Inasal Grilled Chicken with Unlimited Rice

Just thinking about our foodtrip makes my mouth water. I am such a gluttonous pig. Oh well, I guess it will be a long time before I get this kind of body especially with the Christmas Season coming out:

This picture is of Sam Concepcion. Credit goes to Mykikuru Isyusero. Isn't he cute?

So there, that's it. Anyway, I could deal with dieting later. Maybe I will have more willpower next year, but the hair color definitely I could do now. I will post some pictures here after I have it done. Well, thanks for reading this far. :-) Feel free to give me any comments you like, whether it be positive, negative, or even neutral.
Charmedwishes...
Blessed be!

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving! Actually, here in the Philippines, we really don't celebrate Thanksgiving. Maybe we should have our own version of Thanksgiving or maybe we shouldn't just assign a date specifically for that. Why not make every day a Thanksgiving day? I believe that we have a lot to be thankful for. We can thank God for giving us a roof over our head, food that we eat, and for the family that cares for us and loves us. You only have to watch and listen to the news to know that some people have less than that.

I admit that there were occasions when I was less than grateful for the blessings I have and I feel so much discontent. For example, the status of my  love life. Although I pretend to my friends that I am happy being single and that I don't need a man to make me happy, STILL it would be nice to have someone to love me whom I also love. Though I do have my family around me who gives me love, there is another kind of love that I crave.

I have faith though, that someday someone will love me the way I always wished to be loved and I will love him with all of my heart. But for now, let me thank God for all the blessings He gave me and I promise I will share my blessings to others.


Charmedwishes...
Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: I'm Back

Hello guys! I am back! I am so sorry that I wasn't able to post anything for the last 2 days. Our computer had to be repaired (again) and I think we need a new hard disk. I am not sure how much a new one would cost though.

However, that's not all. When I went to sleep last Saturday, I was burning up with fever when I woke up. My fever was climbing up and down. It turns out that I had laryngitis. Pooh, I really dislike being sick! You feel so weak and the food you eat tastes like sawdust and your sense of smell is affected too, probably because of the medicine I was taking.

I have to keep this post short, my medicine is starting to make me drowsy again. I still have this dreadful cough, sigh. Take care and enjoy!



Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Unexpected...

Thanks to those who left comments in my blog, I really appreciate it. Well, lots of things have been happening to me lately. So I guess I am kind of confused. Anyway, things will be better, I know and I would finally find the "meaning of my life" in Heaven's own time.

Something funny and kind of weird happened (again) to me yesterday, but this time it happned when I was on my way to work. I was walking towards our office and I was very sleepy, we were asked to render 1 hour pre-shift overtime and I didn't get enough sleep. And then suddenly I heard a voice at my side, asking me what time it was. I replied that it was almost 6pm.

I thought that was it, and I kept on walking. I noticed that he was walking in stride with me and suddenly he spoke again, asking me where I was going off to. I was suprised and I lokked at him carefully at that time and I noticed that he was a cute guy wearing a t-shirt and khaki shorts. I answered, just around the corner and then I walked a little faster, hoping to shake him off.

But he remained at my side and he asked me where I work. Of course, I was not born yesterday. I am not about to disclose personal information with someone off the street. So I just smiled politely and continued to walk. But the persistent boy followed me and finally he asked me if I wanted to get his number. The nerve! I almost ran, thankfully he got the hint and finally left my side.

I am of the opinion that he was a streetwalker. I mean, I don't think anyone would take notice of me like that. Besides, shouldn't he be asking for my number and not asking if I wanted to get his number? Hehehehe. Anyway, it kind of amused me at that time.

Anyway, that's all for now! I need to sleep already. Take care and enjoy!

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Living a Life of Illusion

Sometimes I can't help the feeling that
I'm Living a life of illusion
And oh, why can't we let it be
And see thru the hole in this wall of confusion
I just can't help the feeling
I'm Living a life of illusion

Sigh, sometimes I feel that my life is not real. I am still searching for the meaning of my life. Right now, I am living day to day: my life is one big routine. I eat, I sleep, I wake up, go to work, go home, and then repeat the whole process all over again. I get to thinking, is this all there is to my life? How monotonous!

However, there is still hope. I am always seeking ways to change my life, to make my life more happy and fruitful. I am sick of staying in my shell. I am willing to try new things. I want to break free, be more confident! I want to live!

Not making sense? Well, right now, I must admit I am still confused myself. I don't know where to start. But I will get there, nothing to worry about.

That's it for now, take care and enjoy!

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Close Your Eyes

 Hello guys! Thanks to those who were concerned about my sister and mother's dilemma yesterday. When I woke up later that day, I guess they were able to settle their differences since Mommy was carrying the baby and they were having a normal conversation. So all's well that ends well, I guess.

I read this beautiful saying and I thought it made a lot of sense, so let me share it with you:

"If what you see by the eye doesn't please you, then close your eyes and see from the heart. Because the heart can see beauty and love more than the eyes can ever wonder..."

I definitely agree, I hope we can all learn to see the beauty in the people around us even though they don't have perfect skin and the figure to die for. I guess the reason I am sating this is because my insecurity is running haywire again. I will explain in the coming days.

That's it for now. Take care, my angels. Enjoy!





Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Tension in the Morning

Hello! Thanks to those who left comments in my blog, I really appreciate it. I will be visiting your blog shortly after this post. Something really tense and sad happned this morning in our house. It involved primarily my mother and my sister, who just had her baby last December.

My sister has always been a very sensitive person. Sensitive in the sense that she doesn't like being reprimanded (who does, come to think of it) and she doesn't want to be made to feel that she is not in control. Now, my mother on the other hand, is a very domineering and opinionated woman. When she wants to say something, she say it at once, regardless whether or not if it was delivered in a tactful and nice way.

What happened was that my sister was putting her baby (my niece Yahannah, I posted her pictures here in my blog) to sleep and she had to go out of the room to do something. My mother was cleaning the house because she was expecting company, one of her organization comes every Tuesday morning here in our house. Now, we were all startled when my sister, her name is Aiza, suddenly screamed and of course we all rushed to the room where the baby is in. It turns out that Aiza saw the baby (Yahannah) lying on the floor when she entered the room, prompting her to scream like that.

Now my mother loves Yahannah, so she was really concerned for the baby so I guess without meaning to, she let fly some choice words like "stupid girl" to my sister. She took the baby from Aiza's arms and then started to cradle the baby. Now my sister was miffed about this and said that she already has everything taken cared of and she grabbed the baby from my mother's arms.

Needless to say, we (my younger twin sisters and I) were all taken aback by this disrespectful behaviour by out sister. Though we must admit that sometimes, Mommy tends to get a little overboard and she does say things which are hurtful, we had to give her the respect she deserves especially since she is our mother. Mother definitely thought that my sister was showing poor behaviour too and she immediately let my sister have it.

So for 10 minutes, mother began her tirade against my sister Aiza (that if weren't for the baby, Mommy would have turned her out of the house, that Aiza was a bigheaded, Aiza is always afraid that people are taking the baby's affection from her, that sort of thing) whioch of course made the atmosphere in our house very tense and we were all quiet.

Now guys, what is your opinion about this? I know that some of my readers are also parents. If this happned to you, you're a new mother and your own mother was teaching you how to take care of your child, how would you handle the situation?

Well, needless to say, Aiza and Mommy are giving each other the cold shoulder now. I hope this would be resolved soon. That's it for now, take care and enjoy!



Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Whew, So Tired!

Hello guys! I wasn't able to use the internet almost the whole day today. Its because today is my Daddy's 55th birthday. We had a small party here in our house and some of our relatives and close friends attended. Of course, we had to make preparations for the party (the food, cleaning the house, etc) and after all the guests left, we had to clean up afterwards. So I am one very fatigued person right now.

I will be posting more later when I wake up. Take care always and enjoy!

A long, long sleep, a famous sleep
That makes no show for dawn
By strech of limb or stir of lid, --
An independent one.

Was ever idleness like this?
Within a hut of stone
To bask the centuries away
Nor once look up for noon?

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: I was Only Dreaming...

Well, time for me to sleep again. I hope you guys are doing all right. I am kind of saddened that one of the followers of my blog stopped following me. I don't know what happened, could it be because I posted something he/she didn't like? I am still glad though that I still have the remaining 25. I do hope someone will give me feedback.

Well, I will close this post here. I have been posting looooong posts recently, hehehehe, got a bit tired. take care and enjoy!

I once had a dream that seemed impossible
I kept on believing and hanging on
Waiting for it to come true
I was naive and childish
I didn't want to listen to the warning words
I didn't want to see the truth
I was selfish and wasted my tears for nothing
Sometimes, No...most of the times
We can't get everything we want
Dreams do come true
But not as we expected.

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: I Remember the Boy, But Not The Feeling

Hello, guys! I am posting this a bit late. The reason for that being is I came home kind of late from work because I met a friend for the very first time this morning. This friend and I (let's just call him CJ) have been friends for almost 2 years now. We don't live that far apart, actually he even has a house here in my hometown, but we have never met before and the only communication we had was thru sending text messages, instant messenging, and phone calls.

We have been planning to meet for a very long time but because of some reason and the other, it keeps being postponed. I must admit, my insecurity was a big part of it. I was afraid that he will reject me after he sees me. I have another thing to confess: I was hoping that this guy will fall in love with me. CJ and I met thru a texting clan (its very popular here in the Philippines, we are a country of text addicts) and during that time, he still had a buddy. (CJ is bisexual). I sort of had a crush on him because not only that he has the qualities that I admire in a guy (or so I thought), he seemed so in love with his ex-buddy and I wanted that love for myself. Until now, so many months after their break-up, he still mentions his ex-buddy. Even though he denies it, I know he still has feelings for his ex.

I guess I am a bit of a masochist; although he made it clear (not directly but you get the idea) that all I am to him was a friend and nothing else, that didn't stop me in carrying a torch for him. That didn't stop me from getting jealous when he meets someone else (I was crazy, I know) and then being extra sweet to CJ. I don't know what it is with me, its like when I see this guy who is attached to someone, you sort of like want this guy for yourself. Its like I have the homewrecker syndrome or something.

Actually, CJ just broke up with a girlfriend and after I knew about it, I again felt the hope that he will finally see me for who I wanted to be, his next buddy. But he found another guy, I must admit this guy is much cuter than I could ever hope to be and probably more outgoing, smart, discreet, etc. So I could do nothing, I just pretended it was okay and that it was absolutely nothing to me that he found this guy. Though he and this guy have not met yet, they met like us electronically, thru the internet and they only send text messages and exchange phone calls. But the difference is that CJ fell in love with this guy, he didn't even look at me that way even once. As I have said, we have known each other for a long time, this guy he only knew for like less than 2 months. Sigh.

So finally the time came for us to meet and that's where my healing started. I found out that the guy I fell for was only an illusion. He was not what I wanted in a boyfriend. Its not just physical or anything, but there was just no spark. Oh, he was nice and all, but I don't feel that tingle, that feeling that I am attracted to him. I was really glad that I finally decided to meet him, now I can start treating him just as a friend. :-) He is probably relieved too, I think he already has an idea of how I felt for him before and now, that I have seen the light, we could just be what he wanted us to be: bestfriends.

Okay, this is already quite long. Thanks for not falling asleep, hehehehe. I am just quite happy that little by little, I am starting to mature. At my age sometimes, I still think like I am 16 years old.

Take care and enjoy!

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Please Give Me a Rose!

Hello guys! I found this site, www.freeflashtoys.com where you can make fun widgets like simpets, photo doll, etc. which you can use in your blog. I chose "Ask the Roses" which is like a guestbook where you can ask whomever who visits your blog any question answerable by "yes" or "no". I was amused by it because the default question was "Do you want to date me?". I just knew I would be able to put this widget to good use. I changed the question to "Do You Like My Blog?"



The fun thing is that if you answer "yes", I get a fresh rose and you can even leave a short message and url for me. If you answer "no", I still get a rose but it will be wilted. Whatever you decide to give me, please do leave me a rose. :-) I hope by the end of the month of September, I will have a vase full of roses! Please don't hesitate to leave whatever message you want.

The "Vase of Roses" is at the bottom of my page. This is only for fun! I hope you will participate. Well, that's all for now. Take care and enjoy!

P.S. You guys probably noticed that I changed my blog layout. :-) Hehehehe, in keeping with the blog name, "If Wishes Were Wings!"

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: No Leave for Next Week

Hello guys! Now, like what I usually do, I want to say thanks to my 26 followers. Here's one big kiss to you guys, mwah! I hope you will visit my blog often. As you can see, I post daily so everytime you visit, there will always be something new here to see. You will still read my ghost stories, that was originally this site was for, but you guys probably noticed that my posts are getting more varied as time pass. I just thought I shouldn't concentrate in one genre. Besides, I also have more than 1 interest, why settle right?

I am kind of sad because my leave for next week was not approved. Sigh. Its because I filed it too late, most of those who were approved filed it like months and months ago. I filed again for the last week of September, hopefully that will be approved. I really want to have more rest time and so I could concentrate more on my blog.

I will be taking some pictures of my hometown very soon, so you would have an idea about where I live. I was inspired by some blogger friends I have that featured their home and have lots of personal pictures, so I would do that myself. Again guys, I am very open for suggestions here. What do you want to see in my blog?

Okay, time for me to go bloghopping and visit my blogger friends. After that, time to sleep. Take care always, mwah!



Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Starstrucked!

Before I go to sleep, let me take this opportunity to thank my 23 followers. That's right, I now have 23 followers, I am so thrilled. Thanks and I hope you will continue to watch our blog (its not just mine now, its also yours) grow. Please don't hesitate to leave comments, positive or negative. I really want to hear from you guys.

I also want to say thanks to Lisa of Little Lovables for her very kind and generous offer. I joined Margaret's giveaway (see post for Teddy Bear Giveaway here) and sweet Lisa said that if ever I don't win the book to drop by her blog and she will give me something to compensate for it. Lisa, if you are reading this, I will definitely drop by your blog. Hehehehe. Please visit her blog too as well as Margaret's blog, their blogs are so cute.

When I was on my way home from work earlier, my officemate (her name is Marielle) and I noticed this bright lights near our office. I thought those lights were just placed there to attract customers but Marielle said that there must be a shooting nearby. It turns out that she was right, there was a film crew nearby shooting a scene in one of the bars there.

Of course, Marielle's curiosity was very piqued and I must admit that mine was too, however if I wasn't with her at that time, I wouldn't have gone there my myself. I would have been embarassed if I was turned away but luckily Marielle was there with me so even if that happens, at least I won't have to suffer the embrassment alone, hehehehe.

So there we were, I think the crew was playing back the scene they just shot coz the people there were just sitting around, tiredly watching and listening to this monitor (it was around 5am by the way, almost dawnbreak). I didn't see anyone famous there so I thought that it was probable just a commercial shoot or something. But Marielle quickly approached one of the bystanders there, I lagged behind, my interest just about dwindling. Then I saw Marielle light up like a neon sign and then excitedly getsured for me to come near. I approached her and she gushed out that they were filming "Lovers in Paris" (to those who are not familiar, its a Korean soap opera remake that is going to be shown here in the Philippines) and the actors filming were Assunta da Rossi, KC Concepcion, and Piolo Pascual!

Now, if it were just Assunta and KC (again, both are Filipina actresses), I wouldn't have cared so much and I probably would have watched with just casual interest, but Piolo Pascual! Gosh, he is my ultimate crush! When I finally saw him, I had to stifle my scream and I felt all shivery and weak inside. I was so upset I didn't bring my camera phone with me, I would have taken shotsa of Piolo. Then when he came so close to where I was standing, Like 7 feet away, I felt like I was going to faint! He was so cute and hunky! I swear, I was swooning.

Then it was over, they shot the scene and they went back inside the bar, probably to rest since I said they were working during that early hour, poor Piolo was probably tired to death. Anyway, I will definitely be bringing my camera phone with me later, just in case they will be shooting again in that place tomorrow!

Okay, that's all for now folks! Take care and enjoy!

"KC Concepcion and my crush, Piolo Pascual"

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: My 200th Post!

Yahoo! Its my 200th post. I can't believe how time flies. Time passes so quickly when you are enjoying what you are doing. In honor of my 200th post, I will be sharing something more about me, the author of this blog.

But before I do that, l just want to thank the lovely people who followed my blog. I now have 20 followers, yehey! I love you guys, thank you, thank you, thank you! You people really inspire me to do my best. I just hope that you guys are enjoying the things I post whether it is scary, funny, etc. Whatever I post here, its just something that crossed my quirky mind, something that I want to share about me.

Which brings me to another topic: How long will I remain single? Sigh, I have been loveless for so long now. Don't say I haven't tried looking for my Prince Charming, because I have. Like the Princess in the story, I have been kissing a lot of frogs, but none of them turned into a prince. Its all been me taking the chance and then me losing in the end.

I know, people have been saying, you should be patient, the right guy will come, just wait and see. Well, I am not getting any younger here. I will be celebrating my 28th birthday in October. At my age, most people already have their own family (not that I want to have a heterosexual relationship and get married), but what about me? I do want romance and to feel loved and be loved. Which brings me to yet another topic: How come my younger siblings have lovelives and I do not?

I am the eldest of 5 children, my younger brother is already living with his girlfriend and they share one apartment. My middle sister already has a baby with her boyfriend. My youngest sisters (they are twins) have their own boyfriends. The longest relationship I had only lasted for 4 months (no matter how hard I tried to save the relationship). I can't help but feel jealous and wonder how come they have people who love them and I don't.

This only adds to my somewhat very low self-esteem. I have already said in my previous post that I am doing my best to be more confident and to love myself. But its so difficult, honestly. Its hard trying to know your self-worth when things do not go the way you want it to go.

Right now, I could say that blogging is very therapeutic for me. I meet so many wonderful people, and these people share their own lives and I learn so many things about them. When I started this blog, I thought nobody will be interested to read (my low self-confidence speaking again) but you guys proved me wrong. That's why I am so grateful. Will you guys join me to my journey to wherever it leads me?

Okay guys, better close this now. I am getting teary-eyed again. I am so emotional. Take care and enjoy!









Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: The Most Beautiful Day on Earth

In just a few more hours, we will be crowning the new Miss Universe for 2009. I am so excited to watch this, not because I am in anyway related to the Philippine delegate, its just that it will be another feather in our country's cap if she does win. I haven't had the chance to watch this girl's progress closely, but based on what I heard, she truly has a chance to bag the crown.

We only had 2 Miss Universe in the Philippines, Gloria Diaz (1969) and Margarita Moran (1973) and hopefully (keeping my fingers crossed), Bianca Manalo will be the 3rd Miss Universe. I love watching beauty pageants, probably because I love looking at beauty and enriching my life with it.

Which brings me to the subject of beauty. I have to admit, dear readers, that I am suffering from what is commonly known as "inferiority complex". If you have known me in person, you will know how shy and introverted I really am. I was never the life of the party, I never greet people first, afraid that they will ignore me. This started when I had the WORST case of acne when I was merely 13 years old. I was just about to start high school then and I had to transfer to another school, it was really difficult for me to make friends. I felt I lacked "beauty", physical beauty that is. I felt I was the most unfortunate person in the world. To add insult to the injury, my younger sister was starting to bloom at that time, so imagine how I felt when people say how pretty she is and then there I was, looking absolutely miserable.

But looking back on it, it was difficult for me to make friends that time not because the people around me alienated me, it was because of my very low self-esteem. As I said, I was painfully shy and I seldom talked. Some people actually thought I was mute, it was that horrible. But as time passed by, I slowly began to realize that its okay, even though I will never be voted as the cutest guy in school, what's important is how you project yourself. I felt that instead of being so down because I think I am ugly, why not bring emphasis on the things about me that people will like. I was a voracious reader and even back then I could speak English very well, that what set me apart from the others. I gained the reputation of being a very serious person, in my yearbook the comment underneath my picture was "Russel was neither popular nor outgoing but he is amiable".

The yearbook comment made me sad at first, I mean why do they have to point out me not being popular nor outgoing? Amiable, hmmmm. It makes me sound like I am so dull. Anyway, after graduating from high school, I tried to reinvent myself. I didn't turn into a wild person but I did my best to reach out. It worked, I think. Hehehehe. Until now I am still trying to resolve the issues I have within myself. Its not easy but hey, nothing worth having is ever easy.

Well, I am not sure if I am still making sense here, so I better go to sleep now, I still have to watch Miss Universe later. Let me close this with this lovely poem:

The beauty of a person
isn't in the clothes he wears,
The figure that he carries,
or the way he combs his hair.

The beauty of a person
must be seen from in his eyes;
Because that's the doorway to his heart,
the place where love resides.

The beauty of a person
isn't in a facial mole;
But true beauty in a person,
is reflected by his soul.

It's the caring that he cares to give,
the passion that he shows;
And the beauty of a person
with passing years only grows.

Take care and enjoy life!

"Bianca Manalo: Miss Philippines 2009"

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!

Time to Sleep: Please Beware!

Every time I start blogging, it is always my habit to open my yahoo messenger and email, just to check if I receive any messages and see if my friends wants to chat with me. I found it really odd when yahoo messeger did not accept my password, then an awful suspicion entered my mind. I quickly opened my email account and my suspicion was confirmed: SOMEONE HACKED MY EMAIL AND CHANGED MY PASSWORD!

Flashback to what happened before I slept this morning: I was very tired, since I just came from work and my mind was not functioning that well, when I saw this email (thinking about it now, it was in the SPAM Folder and that should have been a warning to me already. Duh, I am so stupid!) which was allegedly from yahoo.com asking me to send my email information since they will be updating whatever. Here's the screenshot of the nefarious email:

To my defense, I was feeling kind of groggy and sleep-deprivation was having its toll on my mind and body. I replied to the email with all the information it was asking for. Then I went to sleep. (Note: You might be confused why I sleep in the morning. I work in a callcenter and our customers are based in the USA. There's like a 12-hour time difference, when its 12:00nn in New York for example, its 12am here in the Philippines or something like that.)

Thankfully, I have alternate email addresses and I was able to retrieve my account. I changed the passwords of all my online accounts, making sure that each are different from one another and very hard for other people to guess, and I deleted the email address of that awful creep. Of all the nerve, he added his email address as another alternate email! His email address is kenjohnxx@yahoo.com. I checked if he has a facebook account and it turns out that he has and here it is:

So it tuns out that this person, this Gbenga Adesheye is the culprit. I don't know if this is a fictitious name or what and I don't care to find out. From the sound of his name, it appears he comes from Africa though he changed the information of my account to Atlanta, Georgia. I was about to to send this person a very nasty message, giving him a piece of my mind, but my sisters and mother stopped me, saying to leave it alone and that this person might do more harm to me if I aggravate the situation. It was a good thing I listened because in hindsight, that was very good counsel.

I feel so violated! So it is like this then, you really can't believe that it will happen to you until it hits you right in the face. I am so dazed right now, its like I can't seem to think straight and I want to weep. I am so fortunate I don't have anything in my email that will benefit him; I basically use my email to send and receive messages from my yahoo groups and I don't keep any information that will be of any monetary gain to anyone.

So there you have it folks, please be careful yourselves. Never, ever share personal information with other people as much as possible especially if you don't know that person very well. Don't give out your passwords (I will continue to rue my lack of judgement, I was so naive!) and whatever email account you are using, the moderator will never ask for your details to send in an email, they usually just send you a link to click. The wisest advice is: Don't do any transactions as much as possible when you are feeling sleepy or distracted. Believe me, I learned the hard way.

Enough of that, on a more positive note, I have 18 followers now. Hooray! I am happy because of that. I won't let you guys down, I will do my best to make my blog enjoyable for all of us! take care and blessed be!

The evening hangs beneath the moon,
A silver thread on darkened dune,
With closing eyes and resting head,
I know that sleep is coming soon,
Upon my pillow safe in bed,
A thousand pictures fill my head,
I cannot sleep my mind's a-flight,
And yet my limbs seen made of lead,
If there are noises in the night,
A frightening shadow; flickering light,
Then I surrender unto sleep,
I surrender unto sleep,
Sleep....
Sleep.....
Sleep......

Charmedwishes...

Blessed be!