15. White Bread Demon
“Bread is swell, but what I’m really excited about is eating jelly made from the blood of the innocent!”
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14. French Suicide Sausage
It’s enough to make you want to be a vegetarian.
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13. A Girl Around The House
It’s nice to have a girl around the house… especially if you are a psychopath serial killer who makes women into rugs!
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12. Chubby
Who needs self-esteem when you can have a free fashion book for chubbies? Also, proving that advertising weight representation has always been screwed up, the girl pictured is totally not chubby.
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11. Christmas Weapons
The family that guns together, has funs together.
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10. Eye patch. Shirt. Baby Tiger.
Sexy?
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9. Chase & Sandborn Spanking
She totally deserves it. Seriously, what kind of woman doesn’t “store test” for fresher coffee?
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Nothing wants to make consumers buy chocolate more than 5 faces of a sickly kid looking 5 different shades of miserable.
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7. Root Beer Baby!
Mama, please DO NOT give your baby another glass of Root Beer. It is clearly doing something horrible to him. He is terrifying.
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6. Locked Out
You better wash out your privates with Lysol, or your husband will install cartoon locks on the door.
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5. Pears Soap Disaster
“Pears Soap- now with such a soothing lather, you won’t notice that your baby has gotten into a horrible accident!”
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4. Postage Meter Murder
“Is it always illegal to kill a woman?” This is a truly important question and makes us want to buy a new postage meter.
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3. Shave Yourself
The old man baby’s gonna sing karaoke into a razor! Hooray!
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JonBenét Ramsey, eat your heart out. (Too soon?) This ad makes us want to scream, gouge out our eyes and then barf.
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1. Chocolate Poulain
Drink that cocoa, or this clown will murder you in your sleep.
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P.S. I'm sure we already learned what's tasteful and what's not! At least these ads were good for a few laughs.
Charmedwishes...
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Blessed be!
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