For me, this is the way a Barbie Doll should look like. Beautiful, fresh, fashionable, forever young and vibrant... (The dolls above look like they are from a sorority, hehehe)

Since I was a kid, I liked playing with dolls, ESPECIALLY Barbie dolls (take note, I am a boy so you can put 2 and 2 together and come up with 5, hehehe). I am currently 27, turning 28 this October, but my fascination with Barbie still hasn't waned. I plan on showering my baby niece, Yannah, with Barbie dolls when she is old enough to play with it. But the dolls you are going to see next are definitely not on the list! Some of the dolls are okay and even educational, but most of them are just ghastly. So here's some of the weirdest Barbie dolls ever conceived...

1. Zombie Barbie

She could definitly be staring in MJ's Thriller movie, the Zombie Barbie is a sexy, creepy and totally modern woman.

2. Pregnant Barbie

3. Princess Unicorn Barbie

It's the doll you never knew you wanted, the "Princess Unicorn Barbie." Little girls everywhere are dreaming and drawing up lists for princesses they want wrapped.

4. Fat Barbie

This fat Barbie was created as an ad for the Active Life Movement that used iconic children's toys to get their tagline out to parents to “Keep obesity away from your child.”

5. Oreo Barbie

In 1997, the "Oreo Barbie" scandalized the African-American community which slammed the name for insinuating that the doll is like the eponymous cookie: "black on the outside, white on the inside".

6. Working Mother Barbie

She didn't just fall off of the turnip truck! Turleen is a sophisticated and patriotic American and a model working mother. After hours of hard work gathering carts at the Honk & Holler and waitressing at the elegant Bowlarama, she still finds time to spend quality time with her kids. With seven children and one on the way, she recently won the Mother of the Year Award from the Pink Flamingo Trailer Park Homeowners Association! This special trophy sits proudly on the kitchen window sill in her luxurious double-wide next to her six first place Little Miss Guzzler Awards from the county fair! Yes, this honey has grown up! She's got a bun in the oven and she's ready to hit the town! Just push her belly button and Trash Talkin' Turleen will share some pearls of wisdom with the sophistication and style that makes her family and third grade teacher proud. Turleen stands approximately 12" tall. ( This is among one of the dolls here which I especially hate. What kind of parents will buy their child something so disgraceful? oh yes, bad parents.)

7. Blood and Diamonds Barbie

Blood and Diamonds Barbie designed and created by Carmen of The Perfect Dark One Of A Kind (OOAK) Dolls. (This doll is so crass, even with the diamonds, I don't know why...)

8. World's Most Expensive Barbie

The world's most expensive Barbie doll, designed by De Beers, is dressed in an evening gown decorated with 160 diamonds and she has complimentary gold jewelry and accessories. “This Barbie was produced to mark the 40th anniversary in 1999 comes and was retailed at $85,000. Whilst if you think it is a too expensive deal to be done, then you can eye 1959 Barbie No. 1 carrying a price tag of $8000,” according to Elite Choice. (Now this is the most beautiful and tastleful Barbie in this list. This is something I would want to own. The doll looks a little like Naomi Campbell.)

9. Barbie's Muslim cousin

Now here's a doll Muslim girls could identify with, Barbie's Muslim cousin: Razanne. I think this is nice, that we could make dolls into every kind of ethnicity and race.

10. Twilight Barbie

The Twilight frenzy continues with the new Edward and Bella Barbie dolls. The Twilight Barbies turn Stephanie Meyer's characters Bella Swan (played by Kristen Stewart) and Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) into an updated Barbie and Ken. The Edward doll is true to the Twilight saga with his vampire features, like shimmering skin and signature gold-colored eyes. The dolls are sold separately and are currently available at Toys ‘R Us.

11. Amy Winehouse Barbie

We've seen celebrity dolls used as narcissist promotional tools, but not often do we see memorabilia that accentuates a star's less appealing attributes. This Amy Winehouse Barbie has a lot of similarity with the real UK crooner, complete with black, messy beehive hair style, tattoos and dramatically winged eye liner which has been smudged by her tears.

12. Barbie's wheelchair-bound friend

In May 1997, Mattel introduced Barbie's wheelchair-bound friend Becky. But the initiative came under fire when a teenager with cerebral palsy pointed out that the doll's wheelchair did not fit into the elevator in Barbie's house.

13. Ghetto Fabulous Barbie

Ghetto Barbie, kids with different Kens, sold separately. (Tsk, tsk, words fails me...)

14. Trailer Trash Barbie

it's the famous trailer trash barbie. Every town has one, cities have thousands of them, its classic. - Three kids all eighteen months apart, and with different ethnic backgrounds, carrying a stockload of marlboro cowboy killing cigarettes, nasty kraft mac and cheese, and the whiskey. (I hope I won't get any rants about this, I dont' like this image).

15. Hard Rock Barbie

This Barbie isn't so bad. I mean, girls could be rock stars, right? I just wish they would lay off the tattoes, its so uladylike.

16. Growing Up Skipper!

Kids can automatically make puberty occur with the twist of Skipper's arm as they watch her grow taller and develop... boobs? Another twist and she went back to her prepubescent counterpart.

17. Sport and Shave Ken

All kids had to do was draw Ken a beard with the magic facial hair marker, then dip the "shaver" (why "shaver" and not just "razor"?) in water and make Ken ready to go out and play. This is certainly an...interesting doll.

18. Life Size Chocolate Barbie Cake

This is actually gorgeous. However we must remember that this is a cake, and cakes are usually eaten. So please tell me if I am wrong, but is there something disturbing about eating something so lifelike?

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Blessed be!

3 nice comments:

Anonymous said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


Anonymous said...

Theres nothing wrong with barbie having tattoos shes got to appeal to every little girl right? Thats what shes known for. Some little girls already know they dont wanna be a perfect little blonde when they grow up. Some may wanna be like theyre moms. And theyre moms may be completely badass with tattoos and colorful hair.

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